Wednesday, April 06, 2005

I am Sorry

World Magazine has a story on the post-abortion ministry Silent No More which profiles Georgette Forney and Jennifer O'Neil.

It also contains what I would describe as an especially eerie interview with the Patricia Beninato, founder of the I'm Not Sorry

Some excerpts:

WORLD: There is no longer a debate about whether a fetus is a living baby. Yet, a September 2004 Salon article notes that "most abortions in America are about convenience." Morally speaking, what do you think about that?

Beninato: It doesn't bother me. I believe in the Planned Parenthood axiom "every child a wanted child." We see all too often what happens to an unwanted child, the horrors that are inflicted upon them. Yes, a fetus is alive. But weeds are life and mold is life and bugs are life and we destroy those on a regular basis. Pro-lifers want to give the impression that abortion is someone ripping a full-term baby out of a woman's womb and dashing its brains out against the nearest wall, when in actuality the average abortion—nearly 90 percent—is done within the first trimester.


Living human beings are now being compared to weeds, mold, and bugs. To Ms. Beninato the unborn if unwanted by their mother are pests that should be routinely destroyed without a second thought.

WORLD: Do you think women who tell stories of pain and regret over their abortions are telling the truth?

Beninato: I have no doubt that there are women who regret their abortions. . . . But when you read the stories on the regretful sites, a theme starts popping up—"I didn't want to abort, but. . . ." And they start the blame game. . . . "My boyfriend said he'd leave me." "My parents said they'd stop paying for school." Never is it said that they made the decision. Until someone can show me a case where a woman was tied up, stuffed in the trunk of a car, brought to a clinic and tied down onto a table, I will always believe that a woman knew exactly what she was doing. —•


The interesting thing here is that same "theme" pops up with post-abortive women who say they "aren't sorry." They also do what Beninato calls "the blame game." On Beninato's web site - Melissa says, "Now, I know that I could never have raised a child at that time in my life. I don't have to justify my decision to anyone; I don't have to have excuses why I did it." She first feels the need to justify her decision (I could have never raised the child) and then claims she doesn't have to justify her decision.

After discussing her former abusive husband, Keri says, "I took a pregnancy test, and cried when I saw the results. My life was hard enough: being on active duty and up for promotion, in the middle of divorce proceedings, and the Universe was making me a mother to the child of a man who had just run out on me? There was never any debate, no "what if?", no questions. There was only a brief moment of utter horror, then a firm resolve to undo this." She then discusses how her current husband wouldn't have dated her much less married her if she had a child.

Greta says, "Having the baby wasn�t an option for me, but even the cost of an abortion would send me packing my bags and heading home to Mom and Dad just when I had finally begun to live independently. I was disappointed in myself- I had (expletive) up royally. The man I was seeing offered no support, financially or emotionally. He was a marginally employed heroin user who alternated between imploring me to have the child and not speaking to me."

In all these stories (the first 3 I picked at random from Beninato's web site) a post-abortive woman on one hand is saying, "I'm not sorry for my abortion" but on the other hand is saying, "This is why I had to have the abortion" and trying to explain why she had no other choice. If abortion is this free and/or empowering choice why do post-abortive women who say they aren't sorry for their decision feel the need to explain why they had to make this choice?

My prayers go out to Beninato and the women who visit her site and post their stories.

HT: Naaman

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